30-31 months.

beckett,
your sister was born 1 day before your 30th month birthday. this month was so extremely crazy, different and you just transitioned perfectly, like always.  grandma came into town a week before sister was born, hoping you would get adjusted to her so, she could watch you while we were in the hospital. you loved her and had so much fun with her, i think you wore her out though. shhh.
on November 5, 2012, your sister, wren ralee, was born and you loved her from the moment you saw her. you came up to the hospital the first evening. she was born at 3:58pm and you came up around 4:45pm. you walked in the room and said hi mommy and came over and wanted me to hold you. so, you crawled up in the bed with me and wren and you just looked at her and then gave her a kiss. you smiled. the dr then took her to do an exam and you just watched intently at everything he did to her. he rolled her over and she started to cry and your eyes got so big, you didn't know what to think.  she brought you a present. a deluxe mr. potato head. you were in heaven with that. you thought it i was so cool.
the next day you came up to the hospital and i missed you so much. that was the first night i had ever been away from you. i didn't like being away from you, i was ready to just bring her home. when you got there, you wanted to crawl up in the bed again and hold her. you just took to holding her so well. it was such a sweet thing to witness. i love that you love her, it is just so cool.

things i don't want to forget.

• how you can totally catch a ball
• how you say "that's enough" in the right context
• you got your first ear infection, you were saying "owe" one morning and pulling at your ear. i took you to the dr that day and sure enough. she said you needed antibiotics and i was so sad to have to put you on them. you have never really been sick and never had an ear infection. i felt like somehow it was my fault and that i had failed you. i was so sad. the dr gave you a popsicle and you opened and said aww so she could check your throat.  over the next few days, i felt so bad for you. you ate a ton of popsicles and eventually started taking your antibiotics like a big boy. you are so resilient, you got well quick.
• you can effectively blow your nose (awesome, no more booger sucker)
• you say, "i diagnosis," "special assignment"
• you said, "i love you sister" in the sweetest voice one night
• you act like it's no big deal we have wren. like it's always been this way
• you love on her all the time. although, you don't realize how heavy handed you are with her, you mean well.
• how big you look compared to wren
• they way you say wren
• you like to help with her pacie and get diapers and you want to do it all by yourself
• when she is crying, the way you say, "it's ok wren" or "wren, it's ok," and "don't cry sister."
• you say "ta da"
• how if someone ask you something you don't know, you say, "i don't know" in such a funny way
• you say, "i wanna hold her" you hold her for a bit and then you are done. you say, "done" and kind of just let go of her
• when i have the breast pump out, you always want to put it on
• one night you gave everyone a kiss good night and started to walk downstairs and the remembered and said, "i need to kiss sister."
• you get in her bassinet and act like a baby and you think it is so funny
• you loved trick or treating. we went downtown for your first halloween stroll, you absolutely loved it. you would just go up to the shops and say "trick or treat" and then you wanted to sit on every bench you saw and eat a piece of candy. your dad and i just had a blast watching you grow up right before our eyes. seeing is i was almost 40 weeks pregnant with your sister, i was exhausted after an hour and half of walking and bending down to help you and carrying you back to the car. i thought i was going to go into labor that night from all the walking. no. your father and i soaked in the last little bit of the family of three and you being an only child. we all had so much fun. 
• you do this funny frankenstein walk. you sort of hunch over and swing your arms and walk with stiff legs. with this funny face

thank you for being so kind to your sister. you have made the transition so easy. i love you to the moon and back.

welcome wren raelee.

dear wren,
we decided to induce on november 5, 2102 because there was somewhat of a concern that my placenta would stop functioning.  i was really nervous considering how tough your brother was on me. meme got her the day before and grandma was here the week before to help with your brother. the morning of the 5th, we went to the hospital at 6:00 a.m. on the 5th. they started all my IV and placed the cytotech pill to continue the preparation process. i was dilated to almost a 2cm and 90% effaced when we started.  the next few hours were pretty good. i was having minor contractions and was able to walk and get in the spa tub and roll back and forth on the exercise ball. dr mary bowman came in and broke my water around 10:30 a.m.  for some reason, this one really hurt as compared to your brother. there wasn't a real gush of water. your head was acting like a plug. i was really anxious to get the epidural because i had waited so long on your brother but i continued to wait. your dad and i walked the halls and over the next few hours my contractions began to get a lot tougher. i remember walking down the hall and having to stop to breathe and i slightly began to cry and your dad said, "whats wrong?" i just felt so overwhelmed.  remembering how hard your brother was on me, i didn't want to go through that/this again.  it only lasted a few moments because i knew there was no choice in the matter. i got back to the room and decided to take another bath. after i got out, i decided to get the epidural for fear of waiting too long again. it was around 2:00pm and i was dilated to almost a 6cm and 100% effaced.  the nurse tried to start me on fluids and my line blew. so she was scrambling to get another IV started and had the hardest time. it was a little crazy. then the anesthesiologist came in and the nurse finally got the IV fluids started. the dr placed my epidural and i remember a very sharp electric shock down my right leg. it sort of scared me but the dr reassured me it was fine. it took her about 10 minutes to get everything in and going. i definitely had some relief from the contractions but not complete. once i had to lie down, you decided to put your butt or a foot right in my ribs. i couldn't breathe the whole rest of the delivery. i was so uncomfortable. i still had to breathe through my contractions. i assume the epidural didn't take full affect. i dilated quickly after that. at 3:30pm the nurse checked me,  i was dilated to 10cm and 100% effaced. it was time. i was so nervous i was going to have to push for almost 4 hours again. she told me to push with the next contraction to see how far i could bring you down. so with the next contraction i did and she said ok again with the next contraction push, so i did. she then said ok stop. i need to call the dr.  i didn't really push the next 9 minutes or so but i wanted to.  dr bowman walked in and asked the nurse if she should scrub up and the nurse said, "yes, you better." once the dr entered the room, i asked if i could push again, she said, "of course, go right ahead." i pushed through three contractions while she was putting her garb on. when she got over to me i pushed through another contraction and then on the next one i pushed once, twice, three times and you pushed off my rib one last time and you were out!! at 3:58pm, the dr handed her to me and placed you on my chest. we saw your beautiful perfectly healthy little body and face. you weighed 7lbs 4oz and were 20.5inches long.  from the moment we saw you, we were madly in love and you had us wrapped around your little finger. you were worth every sick moment of pregnancy and every painful contraction. i couldn't believe one moment you were inside me and the next, i was holding this beautiful, perfect human being.  after drying our tears of joy, we couldn't stop staring at you. i felt sick and your dad kept asking me what are we gonna name her.  all i could think about was  puking.  he just kept asking. i said how about wren. i loved that name from the first time i saw it but wasn't until i saw you that i knew that was supposed to be your name. when i told your aunt anna and tricia what your middle name was, they both cried. they were so excited you were named after them.  around four thirty your brother came in and you met him for the first time. he immediately wanted to get on the bed with us and gave you a kiss and i introduced you two. it was love at first sight for him. he instantly was connected and it was so cool to see.

my list of names for you were:

1. ivy
2. holden
3. amelia
4. wren
5. livie
6. evie
7. mila
8. sloan
9. parker

it came down to wren and mila in the delivery room after you were born and we just thought you looked like a wren. also, we didn't want people to pronounce your name wrong if we went with MILA="me"-la.

newborn stats 
november 5, 2012
3:58pm

weight: 7lbs 4oz

length:  20.5"

head circumference:  14.25 inches

clothes size: newborn 

size newborn diapers

this cooing was so soft and sweet. i feel in love with you instantly. you were absolutely beautiful and perfect. i was so happy to finally be holding you in my arms. it was like you were always a part of our family.  

november 6, 2012

going home. 

i love you to the moon and back.